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As society dictates, if a man is providing well for his family, the family lives in a good house and financially stable. There is truth in that but there is also one thing missing, the understanding and acceptance of men’s vulnerability. Christopher Hoffman of RYNO Motors speaks to a diverse audience about this topic, being an advocate of erotic awareness and surrendering to vulnerability. Learn the difference between asking people and making clear offers for them where their only response is to say yes.

We’re back with an amazing show with my new friend, Chris Hoffmann who wrote a book called HEART in Gear: An Engineer’s Erotic Journey to Freedom, which I loved. We talked about a whole range of topics from vulnerability to life lessons to erotic to masquerade sex parties, the whole kit and caboodle always here at Tuff Love. Elizabeth comes on the line, asks a few questions, and basically just adds her feminine energy to the conversation. It’s just a really fun show. Step in, enjoy, and we’ll start the show. Thank you so much for being here.

093: Men’s Vulnerability vs. Control with Christopher Hoffman

It has been quite the five weeks for myself. I just decided on Labor Day about five weeks ago to launch an Indiegogo campaign to support my book proposal. I finished that with 110%, 112% over my goal. Shout-out for making and bypassing goals. Also sent out a little book proposal to Hay House, so we’ll see what actually wants to happen in the universe. I’m very excited about that. I lectured in Seattle, had some great information at Laguna Beach, and here we are very excited with my new friend, Chris Hoffmann, talking about many things. 

I first want to tell you the story of how I met Chris. When you want to write a book, the most important thing is to read as many books as possible, one because it educates you and informs you. It’s a form of competitive analysis on some level, and I think you learn as much from your competitors as you do from your teachers. I’ve been reading books left and right, any book that sparked my interest especially around men’s work, I’ll buy and that’s the beauty of Amazon and the danger of Amazon. It’s a one-click shopping, which shows up on my business credit card bill every day. I’m scanning through my little Facebook feed and there’s this book called HEART in Gear: An Engineer’s Erotic Journey to Freedom. That was a no-brainer to buy that one on Amazon; Erotic, engineer and freedom in the same sentence, what a great title. Most books I buy, I do not complete. I’ll read a chapter or I’ll read half of it. I’ll read three-quarters of it, get the flavor, get the thesis, steal as many concepts as possible. Chris’ book, HEART in Gear, I just read the whole thing in three or four days. It’s a great read. The concept is about a geek who discovers his freedom through an erotic journey. I thought, “Another brother on the journey,” because I was definitely a geek engineer who went on an erotic journey and found my freedom through it. It was an incredible book. His story is completely different from mine.

TL 093 | Erotic Awareness

Erotic Awareness: HEART in Gear: An Engineer’s Erotic Journey to Freedom

Probably about a month or six weeks later, I got this Facebook message from this woman, Jillian, who said, “We’re in Los Angeles and we’re trying to connect to other like-minded people. My friend’s name is Chris. He wrote this book called HEART in Gear.” I wrote back, “I have to admit it sounded really cool. I have read that book.” She’s like, “You did?” I was like, “Yes.” They came over to my office in Woodland Hills. We had a grand old time talking for two hours that could have gone to six hours easy, and became fast friends, and so here he is on the show. 

As author, innovator and provocateur, Chris Hoffmann has appeared on network television programs such as The Today Show, Discovery Channel and the TEDx stage. Chris’ life is defined by innovation and entrepreneurship in harmony with erotic expression and awakening. After twenty years as an automotive engineer, he gave it up to follow his globally positioned, one-wheeled personal transportation startup, RYNO Motors. Currently, Chris is focused on writing and speaking to diverse audiences around the world on his main passions: innovation, advocating for erotic awareness and the courage to be vulnerable. Welcome to the show, a real pleasure to have you. 

Hi, Robert.

Where did you get this idea for this one-wheeled motorcycle? How did you figure that piece out? 

Literally, I was driving. I had to go fishing with my thirteen-year-old daughter. She’s been saying, “Daddy, I saw this one-wheeled motorcycle in a video game. Could you actually build that?” I’m like, “I don’t know. What does that look like?” She draws me a sketch in the car and we talked about it a little bit. There’s that Segway scooter thing, and then I got on the internet and tried to find the thing that was going to stop me from doing that, and I just kept finding stuff. At that time, Gyros got really cheap and all that motors and the BattleBots TV show was on, so there’s all this cottage industry around parts for that stuff. I just took a machine shop class and had this thing together.

Why would you do this? 

It reaches all the way back to my punk rock days playing bass guitar and the mosh pit and everything, that feeling, that visceral primal feeling of my ego. I’ve been in this twenty-year marriage that was quiet. I saw this thing and I thought, “That suits my personality.” If I could actually make that work, it would be like riding into a coliseum on two horses bareback. I just started and I kept going. I just kept solving problems.

I’ll admit this about myself, when an idea gets stuck in my head I get a little obsessive. I get a little narrow-focused. I get a little single-minded maniac aspect of myself. Is that how it felt like you felt obsessed by this thing? 

I’ve done the “I’m going to be a millionaire” dance in the kitchen so many times. I’m just like, “Whatever.” The way I start thinking is, “What’s going to stop me from doing this? How do I kill this idea as soon as possible without putting six months into it and then finding the thing that’s going to stop me?”

You are prove-the-concept-wrong kind of guy, rather than having common sense basically like me as well.

I’d rather kill it on a technicality as opposed to just overthinking it and talking myself out of it because it’s too complicated or I’m not courageous enough to try.

TL 093 | Erotic Awareness

Erotic Awareness: I’d rather kill it on a technicality as opposed to just overthinking it and talking myself out of it because it’s too complicated or I’m not courageous enough to try.

What did the wife think when you said, “I’m going to make a one-wheeled motorcycle?” 

“That’s nice.” I had to sell my guitar and sell some tools and stuff to make enough money to buy the parts.

You produced your prototype and then you got into a bike accident. Tell us about that.

We were in a couple’s counseling at the time and our therapist was like, “You need to make time to spend evenings together more often.” My daughter’s out for the evening at her friend’s house and I said to my wife, “You want to come and light some candles and hang out tonight?” She’s like, “Tonight’s Desperate Housewives.” I said, “All right, I’m just going to go out and ride my bike around the neighborhood.” I’m just riding my RYNO around the neighborhood. I’m like a folk hero in my neighborhood. People yell at me when I drive by like, “Hey, RYNO man.” I’m riding along at fourteen miles an hour and I didn’t find out until later but the gyro came unplugged. It’s not like falling down on a bike. This is a self-balancing vehicle where it didn’t know which way was up. It hits the ground like a hammer blow. At fourteen miles an hour, I had to face-plant, broke my jaw in two places, and broke my hands. I was still conscious but after the EMS truck left and everything and the bike got dragged back to my house the next day and looking out the window the next day at this thing in the rain, it’s a humbling experience.

Let’s shift. On reading the book, you went on an erotic journey. I really highly recommend you read this book. It’s very easy to read. It’s inspiring on many levels. Your vulnerability is really inspiring. I’m going to ask this tough question. Can you give us two or three of your top favorite lessons you got from your erotic journeys or things that surprised you? What grew you as a man on this journey?

I think the big three are probably actually getting clear about what my dad’s deal was. The other one was how insecure I really am or was at the time, and the strategies that I used to make up for it. I think the other one was just that wanting to control everything and finally letting go and allowing everybody to just be who they are. Examples of that are, you start ranting about your father on paper and then you read it back and it’s just like, “That’s bullshit. That doesn’t feel right.” He was emotionally unavailable and then you realize no, he was sitting in a seething rage. The way he would rail against the outside world is all he could do to be present and recognize that I was standing there. It’s not that he was intentionally avoiding me or not caring about me. He was gone. That’s one thing.

Your impression, your viewpoint around your father was that he didn’t care. He wasn’t present. Through the writing, you discovered that he wasn’t able to care. 

I actually unpacked this whole thread where engineers are unique. This might be a broader expansion of dudes, but once you figure out how to build shit that coins out money, you earn your keep in a stable group. Engineers, I don’t know if they’re super insecure and they figure out engineering later as a way to add value. Once you figure out how to be an engineer, you don’t really have to become emotionally available to anybody. You just sit in your quiet contentment and tell the rest of the world how you got it all figured out and it’s perfect. Nobody has to survive and understand an engineer. That’s the deal. Engineers get really comfortable with their value and it’s weird.

There’s a big difference between asking people to do things for you and making offers. Click To Tweet

Let’s extrapolate this and maybe in our topic a little bit. You wrote to me about talking about men’s vulnerability as the power, as the thing that’s missing. You can call this an engineer but I think a lot of men really do this as well. I’ve coached a lot and talked to a lot. A man feels if he’s providing the money and the house and the stability, they’ve done their job. That’s it. What I’m hearing is that you need to step up and go beyond that to be a complete man. Maybe you want to riff on that.

There’s a big difference between asking people to do things for you and making offers. Making an unattached offer is leadership. I tell a story the difference between asking somebody like, “You want to buy me a coffee?” or, “I’d really enjoy buying you a coffee. What do you think?” The first one is just outsourcing the choice to somebody else. If they say yes, they have to generate something. The second one is, “I’m going to create all the structure. I’m making an offer. You have the freedom to say yes or no, but it puts me in a vulnerable place because if I get a no, I can take it personal.” That’s leadership. I think that’s a common thread that we should talk about throughout the whole thing. It’s an energetic feeling of owning my desire to create my environment where an engineer, once you get good at creating value, you just sit back and you expect everybody else to entertain you.

The first one is I call it drive-by shooting or a drive-by offer. It’s just like, “Hi.” We do this a lot on Facebook. We do this a lot on text messaging. It’s basically like, “Do you want to have a cup of coffee or would you buy me a cup of coffee?” Then you put the locus of the responsibility of your request on the other person. What you’re saying is leadership is, “I’m going to create the container. I’m going to make the request and I’m going to face the rejection.”

It’s a different feeling altogether.

Let’s go into the man-woman dynamics. What’s the advantage to a woman in the second situation? What do you think the benefit is?

What you’re doing is creating an offer she can respond to. If you create a really clear offer that somebody can respond to, all they had to do is say yes and step forward. They don’t have to do anything. They’re free to animate that experience to the best of their ability, but until you create an unattached offer and then shut up and allow them to make their own choice in what they’re going to do, you don’t know your leadership. You’re not in your vulnerability.

Why do you think men don’t do that these days? Why do you think men are lacking in this regard?

TL 093 | Erotic Awareness

Erotic Awareness: If you create a really clear offer that somebody can respond to, all they had to do is say yes and step forward.

It’s because they’re stuck in a systematic system of where women are oppressed and males share their privilege. There’s all this whistle-blowing back and forth like, “Isn’t she hot? Look at her, she’s awesome. Aren’t we cool?” I know its scarcity so we have to define a class of other people to point at so we can remind each other that we’re together. It’s so subtle and men don’t realize they’re in it. A big part of what I talk about is we have to recognize the patriarchy we’re stuck in before we can actually step up and climb out of it.

Let’s go to your second point or maybe it was your third point about you didn’t know how insecure you were. How did your erotic journey show up? I think most men have a level of bravado, have a level of, “I got this all together,” and then they put on top of that insecurity their feathers, their hats and their boas and all those crazy things. How did that show up for you?

It’s a couple of things. We all have demons in our basement. We all have things that we don’t want anybody to really know or we’re embarrassed about. We feel sad. We feel insecure about stuff. My overarching theme is I’ve just got this deep feeling of sadness. I lived with this feeling of sadness. For me to finally realize I can speak from that feeling of sadness and just share my experience and start managing my need to be validated all of the time by people to calm and soothe my anxious feelings, it’s been a huge climb-out. I wanted to do this one-man show where really what’s in our basement is a bunch of orphaned children. They’re not demons at all. They’re just all the orphaned children that have been handed down from multi-generations that nobody ever dealt with. All they really want to do is be seen, get the energy out of it.

Tell us more about what an orphan child means to you. How would someone identify their own orphan children?

These are all parts of ourselves that we have these strategies to cover up. When you’re in your ego and you’re talking to somebody like, “Aren’t I awesome? This is awesome. I’m cool.” They’re like, “No. You’re the one that did the thing. I think you should stop doing that shit. It’s all your fault or whatever.” These are all strategies to mask the fact that, “I feel really scared right now that you’re going to leave. I feel really insecure about my manliness. I get really wound up when people raise their voice at me. Can we create some way of just sharing this?” These are all direct speaking from my feelings and experiences, but it’s scary for people because you can be laughed at.

I just thought about how, “Man up, don’t be a pussy, don’t cry,” all these messages that are hammered into boys since we were young. The orphaned children is created by the society that says your emotions aren’t right. You’ve got to hide that and if you don’t you will be ridiculed.

TL 093 | Erotic Awareness

Erotic Awareness: We all game ourselves on how intense our strategies are or how effective our strategies are to mask our true selves.

It’s almost like we all game ourselves on how intense our strategies are or how effective our strategies are to mask our true selves.

On your erotic journey, how did you evolve in that? How did you notice that? Can you give us a little story?

It showed up actually as I was dating this woman and I kept telling her these stories. I told her the story about the erotic ball and the first time I got my cock sucked by this belly dancer guy. Embedded in these stories are these moral. She was fascinated because I would tell the story like I’m telling them at a campfire and she goes, “What happened at that little moment? You just blew past the nugget of the transformation in that story.” I go, “You’re right. That was all about how this belly dancer dude who posed this big erotic enactment on me and made me realize I’m always the one driving. I’m always the one that feel myself and validate my existence but I never let somebody else have their erotic expression and validate their existence. Surrendering to this big male energy is what it took for me to have that encounter with myself and have this deep appreciation for what women go through.” Here’s this woman having this encounter with this dude who’s at some particular point in his evolution and hoping for the best and sometimes you can’t always control it. That’s an important story to share with dudes because in it is this nugget. Instead of reading a bunch of Tantra manuals and a bunch of blah blah, I have this like Trojan horse stuffed these little morals and this visceral over the shouldered dude trying to figure himself out stories.

My terminology for that is surrender. Surrendering to another man’s energy or releasing all the connotation of a man sucking your cock or all those things and all the years and years of messages saying, “You’re X, Y and Z because of this happening.” Allowing that is a powerful experience. I think it’s time to bring Elizabeth on the line. We can chat and maybe we can answer her question for her. Hello, Elizabeth. Welcome to the show. 

Robert, thank you.

It’s a pleasure having you. Thank you so much for volunteering. 

Elizabeth, how are you?

Chris, nice to meet you.

How can we best be of service to you?

There are so many different points that you’ve brought up that were interesting. One thing that’s sticking in my mind right now is when you were saying how the ability to say, “I would really enjoy to buy you a cup of coffee right now. Would you like that?” I thought about the way that I do that and how it feels like just to direct. I guess there’s a masculine energy in it, but it’s just a direct knowing of what one wants and seeing what happens from there. Maybe that speaks to your point, Robert, about surrender. Knowing what you want and then surrender. I’m just curious what you think about that.

The surrender part comes as just a feeling of being comfortable with the ambiguity of life. Click To Tweet

The surrender part comes as just a feeling of being comfortable with the ambiguity of life. It’s being comfortable with, “I don’t have any attachment to the offer that I’m making. In fact, I see everything as an opportunity. It’s not an obstacle I’m trying to get around or manipulate somehow to get what I want. It’s an opportunity to invest something that I have that’s valuable.” Here’s another one, if I go up to somebody, “Nice weather, or I like your dress or what did you do today?” or you can say, “Can I have five minutes of your time? I think I might enjoy talking to you.” It’s a totally different feeling.

Here’s a funny story. I actually did that at this garden party with this woman. I’d seen her a couple of times and I always was intrigued by her. I’m like, “There she is.” I just go right up to her and I say that, and she goes, “Yeah, okay.” I’ve got five minutes of her time. I go, “Just a second, I want to go and get something off the snack bar. I’ll be right back.” I come back with this thing and there’s this other dude already talking to her and she says to this dude, “Excuse me, I’ve got a five-minute date with this dude.” He’s like, “Who the fuck are you?” We went off and had this great conversation which turned into half an hour. It’s just making such a clear offer that somebody also knows that they could laugh at you. You hand them the keys. That’s really empowering for somebody and they trust you for having the courage to make it that clean. 

Let’s bring it back to you, Elizabeth. Are there places that you want to make more direct requests or your desire or do you feel fear around expressing your desire? Can we unpack any of that for you?

That’s actually a really good question because that happened to me this morning when I was lying in bed with my lover. We were deciding, “Are we going to get up? Are we going to stay in bed? What are we going to do?” I was like, “I don’t know.” He’s like, “What do you want?” I said, “I don’t know.” I really didn’t know. There was a part of me that wanted to stay in bed and make love, and there was another part of me that wanted to get up and get to work. He had to make the decision. He’s like, “This is what your body is telling me,” and he was right. It was interesting, this whole topic of knowing what it is that you want, being able to figure that out.

Did you have a conflict between your body and your head?

I think so. I think that’s what was happening.

That’s a pretty common thing. There’s often the argument of the head and the soul and the heart and the genitals and the spirit. We are driven by many forces inside of us. It makes us the complex human beings we are. Bravo to your guy that was just like, “All right, I’m making the decision,” and listening to the body. That’s really his choice.

TL 093 | Erotic Awareness

Erotic Awareness: Nobody wants to call it because if it sucks, they don’t want to own it. The problem is if it rocks, nobody can claim it.

I’d like to add to that by saying when people collaborate too much and trying to figure out what they want to do, for me what it’s doing is you’re outsourcing the responsibility of whether it’s going to suck or not. Like making dinner plans, “What do you want to do?” “I don’t know.” “What do you want to do?” “I don’t know.” What you’re trying to do is nobody wants to call it because if it sucks, they don’t want to own it. The problem is if it rocks, nobody can claim it. The question for me is, are you in a big energy mood or are you in a quiet mood? Get some data. If you want to go sit quiet somewhere or do you want to go rock some after-hours club? Like A, B I’ll go, “I will set up the after-hours club, I’ll get it all figured out. All you’ve got to do is just get a dress, do your hair, do your nails, and I’ll pick you up in whatever.” He’s totally creating the structure that a woman could just step into. Like walking through a club, he just clears the chairs out of the way so the woman can gracefully walk into the space, and then she could animate because her heart’s open. If it rocks, he totally gets to claim it. You can go, “Let’s go home and fuck the shit out of each other because that rocked.” It’s a divine energy.

What you’re explaining what kind of mood are you in, are you in a big energy mood kind of mood, and then he buys the tickets. He says, “You get dressed and I’ll pick you up and we’ll do it.” He takes everything out of her hands. For me, I love that. I had to get to a point in my life where I can surrender to that. Now that I can surrender to that, I want him to make those decisions and do the planning, and then I can just be.

My advice to women is simply if a dude is like, “You want to get together sometime? You want a coffee? I’m going to be in your neighborhood next week.” She’s like, “I’m sorry but you’re not making me an offer I can respond to. Can you frame something up that is actually an invitation and a clear offer that I can say yes or no to?”

I think what you’re describing also is getting more prevalent in today’s society. I’ve done a lot of reading and writing about this, but the Tinder revolution has really changed the way people are not willing to make commitments. People are a lot less willing to commit. They’re more interested in the quantity than the quality. I think for a man just to be like, “We’re doing this.” I did this with Morgan about a month ago. I said, “We’re going to get massages and we’re going to dinner in Malibu.” She was like, “It’s too expensive. Are you sure?” I’m like, “We’re going.” She was like, “Are you sure?” You have to work through a woman’s resistance to having. I think that’s what a lot of guys are not willing to do is to work with that resistance, to be like, “No, we’re going.” We had such a pleasurable fun night because I was willing to say, “We’re going,” and she was willing to say, “I trust you.” 

The Tinder revolution has really changed the way people are not willing to make commitments. Click To Tweet

It could take that to the extreme. I’ve had problems with women. People are busy. I’m pinging to her and I was like, “I would like to do this with you.” “I’m busy.” Here’s another thing, “I got some tickets. You want to come?” “I don’t know.” Eventually it just gets down to, “I need a solid no from you.” Instead of just bailing or wussing out or just flaming out on it, ask for a solid no. Then that’s like leadership, “I need to invest my energy somewhere else. Give me a no before I wander off.” 

Do you have more thoughts about that Elizabeth?

Yeah. My thought about that particular topic is if it’s initially just the beginning of getting to know the person, I would think that the woman would say yes if she has any interest whatsoever, even if it’s just to, “Let’s see what happens.” If she’s not giving you a yes, I think you’re right. I think the no should be pretty clear.

The only reason I say that is because in this fast-paced quantity environment, the tendency to wander off is pretty quick.

Do you have a follow-up question or thought that we can help you with, Elizabeth, a different topic? You said there are a few things you were interested that we mentioned. 

I’m curious about your book and I want to hear more about your erotic journey. I wonder what that was all about. I want to hear some of the things that you learned that you can share that might be interesting to myself or other people listening.

TL 093 | Erotic Awareness

Erotic Awareness: If you have this open need to be validated, people figure out how to feed you candy and lead you off in all kinds of other directions.

I think the thing I learned right away was there’s a certain amount of vulnerability we’re talking about, to open yourself up to be influenced by women was a new threshold. In my marriage, I had this project manager kind of relationship where we got a lot done and the dog was great, the house was great, dinner was great, but it wasn’t sexy. It wasn’t sexy because we didn’t really want to reveal ourselves to each other. That was okay when we first got married because that’s what my dad taught me. As I started opening up a little bit, I’m realizing, “I want to learn about myself,” and the way to do that is through your interactions with other people. It’s a beautiful improvisation. The threshold is to simply, “I need to open myself to be influenced by what’s happening here and to pay attention.” If you just start evolving and the evolution moves towards where I am now which is, “How do I just meet somebody in this quiet little place of connection? How do I create an environment where we can both just be who we are? How can I invite somebody to just show me something that you normally wouldn’t show about yourself, for yourself, in this environment where I’m just listening?” It’s not about the other person entertaining me. It’s, “How do I create an environment so that they can find out more about themselves?” That’s what I want to do. 

I really like that you’re so clear about you want to create this environment for this to happen. I think that’s a very attractive quality, to have someone who can create this environment where opening and vulnerability can show up.

That’s the most beautiful way we love each other. The way that I love my partner isn’t my attachment to what I need from them. The way I love my partner is to create an environment where they can be themselves.

I think the underlying thing for men too is to build up their self-esteem, their self-validation. What we’re taught as boys and young men and men and old men is that we set our value based on our external validation, to go back to the engineer example of how much we can produce. That puts a lot on a woman to say, “You need to constantly reinforce my value by you giving me the kudos,” which women are trained to do but don’t necessarily like to do. For a man to step up and say, “I love myself. I am so integrated with myself and I feel so solid that we can co-create an environment where both of us can be ourselves.” To me, that is the optimized form of relationship.

What I can add to that, Elizabeth, too is there’s a dynamic when a dude isn’t really conscious of his need to be validated. What happens is that’s how people manipulate you. If you have this open need to be validated, people figure out how to feed you candy and lead you off in all kinds of other directions. I have this experience with this woman I was dating. She says, “Can I just respectfully draw something to your attention?” I said, “Yeah, what’s going on?” She goes, “The flirting thing you do, I don’t mind being funny and silly with women, but the flirting thing shows that you’ve got this need to be validated by the feminine.” I’m like, “Let me simmer that for a couple of days. Let me just go see what I do.” I go wander around for a couple of days and watched myself. She’s totally right. I’m calling for female validation. I report back to her and said, “You’re totally right. I do that shit.” Then she says really the interesting part. She goes, “It’s not that I’m worried about you flirting with women. It’s that you’re showing them how they will manipulate you. If they figure out how to feed that open wound, that scares me. It’s not your flirting that scares me, it’s your exposure to be manipulated. It doesn’t feel safe.” That translates to grifters and addiction.

I tell this funny story about this buddy of mine who went to New York on his high school field trip, steps off the bus. He has a great time. Just before he gets on the bus, he goes after some guy in the streets and says, “Where do I buy a switchblade?” He wanted this switchblade really bad. The guy goes, “Wait right here.” He goes around the corner, comes back ten minutes later, hands him this little paper bag package and says, “Give me $20.” He gives him $20 and he jumps back on the bus and leaves. He unwraps this package, it’s a candy bar. I literally bought a VCR in New York in the same way. I just wanted this VCR so bad, and then the same thing. It’s just what you’re talking about, Robert, when we finally find our own sense of individuation and our own sense of inner self worth. We just don’t need to be validated by the outside world. We just feel safer because we’re being true to ourselves. The way I define vulnerability is saying something while being true to yourself while you risk not getting what you want. “By me being true to myself, I may not get what I want.” That’s not a place that dudes like to be. They tend to increase the chances of them getting it.

Vulnerability is saying something while being true to yourself while you risk not getting what you want. Click To Tweet

Any last thoughts or questions, Elizabeth? 

No, thank you. This is very fun, very interesting.

Thanks, Elizabeth. 

Thanks so much for adding your feminine presence to our dude conversation. It’s really pleasurable. Chris, explain how people can find you, how they can find your book. Let’s make it an Amazon best seller.

It’s an easy thing to remember. It’s HEART in Gear. My website is There’s a bunch of videos, my TED Talk’s on there. It’s pretty easy to find me. RYNO Motors, I’ve got 21 million views on some of my videos. It’s a total geek fest out there. I’m all over the place, easy to find. Buy the book. It’s an awesome read. It’s a gift to humanity. I hope to have my small impact.

You definitely impacted me. It’s such a pleasure. Your RYNO Motors are getting into possible production, you said. It may get your work with some views out. There’s been a challenge in getting one but after this, soon there might be available so you can ride your one-wheeled, total sci-fi geek-out motorcycle. Thank you so much for being on the show. Totally grateful and talk to you soon. 

Thanks, Robert.

I wish I had something to pitch but my Indiegogo campaign is complete and very pleasurably complete. More shows always available at TuffLove.Live. With some open energy, I’m going to start writing. I think there’s a new set of blogging coming out. I’ve got some new opportunity to speaking, maybe one in Chicago coming up. A lot of cool things happening and I’m always grateful for people who come on the show, my groupies. Thank you so much to the groupies all over the world, really grateful for that. For more shows, please visit us at TuffLove.Live. Go forth. Ask for what you want. Create the container for the people in your life to be more true. That is the greatest gift you can give someone. Have some nookie, think of us. We think of you all the time. That’s it. Go forth. We’ll talk to you soon. Thank you.

Thank you so much for joining us on Tuff Love. An amazing show as always with amazing people out there in the world making their impact. Please check out Chris’ book. Check it out at You can find the book. I read it in three days. It’s a really exceptional book. For more shows with me, please visit us at TuffLove.Live. I’ve got a feeling of energy burst coming in so there’s going to be a lot more content and be out there more in the world. Thank you so much. Take care. Have a great day. We’ll talk to you soon. 

Resources mentioned:

About Chris Hoffmann

As an author, innovator and provocateur Chris Hoffmann has turned his creative explorations into one visceral story after another. As an innovator he has appeared on network television programs such as the Today Show, Discovery Channel and the Gadget Show. Chris’ life is defined by innovation and entrepreneurship in harmony with erotic expression and awakening. He now takes his personal explorations and distills them down into simple, funny and easy to grasp concepts that engineers can embrace.

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